Timing.. You know that one thing that we have allowed guide our every day move? Timing. Isn’t it a little pain in the you-know-what when it comes to relationships though? How many things or people have you encountered at the “wrong time”; we meet a person just a couple of months they have to move to another country for school, work, volunteering you name it. We meet that one person we have an amazing connection with but is taken. We meet that one person that is right for us but we were too busy being young and stupid or the other way around, we meet that one person when we are ready to get serious but the last thing the other person wants is seriousness at the moment. And what do we do? We move that into the “could have been” category onto the past or future and we move on or I guess I should say we stay put instead.
I realize there’s no such thing as “it would have been perfect”: it would have been perfect two years ago, it would have been perfect if I didn’t have this job right now, it would have been perfect if he or she lived here. I think this is just a way of like I said before, staying put. Of creating this fantasy in our lives that things will sort themselves out and we won’t have to make any tough choices or take colossal risks. We are willing to take huge risks when moving to another country to get a Master’s Degree, or a really good job or a new business though. We risk so much on these things and yet we don’t risk on things that actually make us happy, things that we actually want. Wether it is to travel, to follow this one guy you meet, to stay for this other person, to go volunteer somewhere or work at the other side of the world for another six months. We are scared of risking such things and I completely understand, this are the toughest choices of our lives but the winnings could be a life changer. The winnings could be all we ever asked for. Sure you can still get some good winnings by playing it safe but I think that if you go all in for something you truly believe is worth it, that’s when you get what you never expected, what you never ever possibly imagined. And yes, being realistic you might also loose it all and it hurts and it crushes you but you get over it and you move on because you know you gave it a chance. And you might have -$20 dollars on the bank but just the thought of “what could have been “comforts you. You know you will be up there again, making life-changing decisions and it’s okay because you trust yourself to be capable to do so.
I got recently asked if I had fallen in love with someone on these past six months of my trip and my answer was that there had been several guys that I wish I had a met at a different time or guys I wish I had met for more than one day. Every once in a while, like it recently happened to me, comes along a guy that surprises you. A guy that was basically a stranger to you and somehow manages to, in one date, become your new “you had my curiosity, but now you have my attention” kind of guy and you can only hope that you will cross paths again someday. “If only I had met him sooner” or “if only I got to go on a second date with him”, but the truth is you were only meant to get a little taste of that person for now and you should be grateful for having met such a person and maybe, just maybe you will encounter this person down the line. But then come the tough ones as well; when you meet people for a longer period of time and actually develop feelings for them, what happens when there’s an end date to that? What happens when the bubble burst? It’s complicated isn’t it?. So we just sit there and let people and moments go by because of timing: “if only I had been here a couple of years ago”, “if only I met you a month ago”, “if only I could stay for longer”. It made me think that we probably don’t meet the wrong people at the wrong time, we meet those people because we were meant to meet them right there and then. The thing I had refused to believe is that the guy I met at the “wrong time” was just the wrong person, it was just an experience and not MY person. Otherwise I would’ve told timing to go F itself and I would’ve had taken the risk of following that one person.
“You never meet the right people at the wrong time because the right people are timeless. The right people make you want to throw away your plans and follow them into the unknown without looking back. You know that any adventure you had originally planned out isn’t going to be half as incredible as the adventures you could have with this person. That no matter what you thought you wanted before, this is better. Everything changes and everything is better since that person came along.
The truth is, when we pass someone up because the timing is wrong, what we are really saying is that we don’t care to spend our time on that person. We could say it’s because we are doing the other person a favor, because we don’t want people to miss out on other experiences, because we don’t want to make any sacrifices or because we don’t want that other person to make any sacrifices. Because when someone is right for us, we make the time to let them into our lives. And that kind of timing is always right but we have to give people a chance. We have to step up and be honest and say things how they are. All in baby!
“The right people don’t stand in the way of the things you once wanted and make you choose them over them. The right people encourage you: To try harder, dream bigger, do better. They bring out the most incredible parts of yourself and make you want to fight harder than ever before. The right people don’t impose limits on your time or your dreams or your abilities. They want to tackle those mountains with you, and they don’t care how much time it takes. With the right person, you have all of the time in the world.”